Gonna Change My Way Of Thinking

2010-05-25T16:38:00.000+08:00

This week I turn 28. Interestingly, it’s not my age, but motherhood, that has given me a clearer sense of self. Or, at least, the urgency to find it. I am not just a woman in this world, I am now a hundred percent wife and hundred percent mother, two things that would best define me. Everything else about me takes up but a minor role in my life.

My emotional and mental hurdle after childbirth took about two and a half weeks to get over. But of all the hurdles that must be overcome during this time, the shallow and superficial physical hurdle is the most obvious and, apparently, the most difficult (for me, at least) to get over.

I still look five months pregnant, and I dread the day someone might ask me when I’m due. Thankfully, of the 47 pounds I gained during pregnancy—most of which came in the last trimester—I only have 18 pounds left to lose. The initial 25 pounds were lost within 2 weeks of childbirth, a welcome surprise since my physician said the average weightloss was at 17 pounds in the first month.

One of the last questions I asked my OB before leaving the hospital was if the dark line on my stomach would disappear, to which she answered to the affirmative. But now, 6 weeks later, I still have it. I also still have dark armpits, a big belly, the extra pounds, and excess skin. Add to that, a major pimple breakout that came after childbirth that I can’t seem to do anything about.

Scrap the dermatologist, what can she prescribe me anyway since I’m breastfeeding? Today, I woke up and decided to go to the parlor. Pedi, eyebrow wax and haircut were on my treatment list, with emphasis on “treat”. I saw Micoh, my stylist, as I entered Piandre in front of ABS-CBN. He’s been doing my hair for about 2 years now, and this time I told him I wanted lots of layers. Make me look good, I said. Of course! He answered, Enough of that “bahala na look”, let’s get YOU back. I love him. And after my haircut (with reference to Kim Kardashian’s), I feel like I’m almost back.

Jasmin did my brows, with so much intensity, I wondered when I would be able to get up from the chair and if I’d reach home in time for my daughter’s next feeding. It usually took her 15 minutes to do my brows, but, I guess, after weeks of neglect, she needed more than 15 minutes. She needed a miracle, and by golly did she work wonders.

If I couldn’t reach my toes during most of my pregnancy, I went to Piandre. After Ada came along, I had no time to run to the trusty parlor, and lived with my un-pedicured nails for a month and a half. I had enough of it and chose a pale pink for my new feet.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not this superficial. On the contrary, I’m very plain, too plain sometimes, my husband has to force me to shop. It’s just that sometimes I need to call on the professionals to undo the damage. But now that I’m a mother with hardly any time for myself, it’s nice to get away for an hour and a half of pampering. My baby isn’t the only one who deserves it.

It’s funny how this new phase I’ve entered made me see how much I need to improve myself, whether mentally, emotionally, or physically. I’ve gotten used to thinking that anything will do. An old shirt will do. These tired jeans will do. I don’t have to accessorize. But now, since I’m practically a brand new person with a brand new lifestyle, I’ve gotten the urge to also look the part.

Last Two Weeks

2007-11-26T07:28:00.000+08:00

The last two weeks have been crazy! I'm so glad the car's in the shop today so I have no choice but to stay home and relax for even just a day. I got out of bed at 10 am, sarap! So, anyway, since I now have time to update this blog, here's what I've been up to the past couple of weeks.

GREEN COHESION party at NBC Tent, Fort on November 16. The uber-talented group of students that make up Animoism presented this event and I was more than glad to host it for them. Too bad I didn't get video of the 3 archers doing an impromptu dance number on stage (I'm sure a lot of other people got to). I hosted with RJ Ledesma and took home a bottle of Jager. Yey!

U-ROCK PREMIERE EPISODE on NU107 last Monday, November 19. We guested students from the University of the Philippines Diliman, the band Chimsons, Sandlady and the UP Broadcasters' Guild. Dan Ramirez, the President of the Guild was our first "Fishbowl" victim. Tonight, it's DLSU-Taft's turn on U-Rock.

HARDBALL on ANC last November 22 to 24. I was asked to sit in for Jinno who was busy in Macau. Hardball is one of the most laid back yet widely viewed shows on ANC! In this photo are Bill, Boyet and I with our guests last Thursday night, Congressman Butch Pichay who is also the President of the Philippine Chess Society and Grand Master Mark Paragua.

So that was a quick rundown of the last two weeks. And speaking of "last two weeks", I'm on my last two weeks of being single!! To tell you the truth, contrary to popular belief, it's not fun! It's 100% stressful. I have a gazillion things to do for the wedding and the house! Thanks anyway to those who tell me to enjoy it. I've spent the last few days in the house fixing the kitchen and the master's bedroom so that Gilson can move in already. He tried to sleep there two nights ago, but ended up going back to his parents' house because it was too quiet. The kitchen in working, baked brownies for the workers and cooked dinner for two nights. All we need is a chopping board and a few more prep bowls and we're all set. The master's room is empty except for the bed, study table and computer, but the bathroom has all the necessities already. Here are the stuff I have to do for the rest of the week:

1. RSVPs! For the wedding party. 2. Visit Dr. Morada 3. Visit Dr. Gammy for teeth whitening (takes two hours!) 4. Stock the cupboards 5. Go to Taal Vista for final meeting - discuss stage, rooms, food, electricity, blah blah blah 6. Fix seating arrangements. Grrr! 7. Prepare sunday lunch for the family (?) 8. Final fitting for gown

See, I have to list all these down or else I will forget. I cannot be a wedding organizer or I'll be terrible at it. Btw, here are photos of our table floral arrangement (no time to fix turn the photo upright, sorry!) and Gils and I at my despedida de soltera last night at Maurizio in De La Costa.

U-Rock on NU107

2007-11-07T07:31:00.000+08:00

I along with Lia Cruz am hosting U-Rock on NU107 starting on November 19, Mondays at 9pm. It will be a whole our of anything campus/university based--activities, orgs, parties, and bands! The show's plug has already started airing, but if you can't sit around and wait for it, do listen to it here :)

The Life of a Bum

2007-08-27T18:30:00.000+08:00

I'm "jobless". I've take "a break" from television work for the moment, but I'm hoping for a permanent thing real soon. The funny thing is, now that I'm jobless, I've been busy with a lot of other things--mostly my wedding and the little catering company. I enrolled in a Fundamentals of Culinary course at Global Academy and this week is my last. Been going to meetings with wedding suppliers including one to Taal Vista Hotel last Wednesday...it was freezing! I'm going to freeze in my gown!

Anyway, here are some photos of my "adventures" over the past few weeks.

This is at "The Room" set in Pasig. We shot this 5 minute video for Every Nation's World Conference in July. Directed by Joaquin Valdes The Giordano fashion show at Trinoma on June 30, the night before my half-marathon! More than meets the eye...at Power Plant Mall last month Hungry?

Rest in Peace

2007-05-16T08:38:00.000+08:00

It's been almost a month since Solomon passed away. He was only 3 months old. He was naed after Djimon Honsou's character in Blood Diamond because he was given to me the night Gils and I watched the movie. He died of Hatchling Failure Syndrome, a common cause of death for sulcatas like mine which is severe dehydration. Although the bought of dehydration could have occured even before I took him home, I did everything I could to save him.

I took him to the vet when I felt his shell soften and he was given a shot of vitamins. I was advised to force feed with watermelon or cucumber juice using a syringe. Two days later, I noticed he was a little more active, but 2 hours later I found him dead with a malunggay leaf in his mouth.

I still miss him and he'll always be my favorite tortoise.

A Dirty Finger

2007-05-16T08:18:00.000+08:00

On Monday I exercised my right to vote once again and listed only 4 senatorial candidates on my ballot. I don't believe in filling up the ballot for that sake. I've always looked forward to election day. I do believe that it's a right, and I am making a change in the smallest way.

When I got home that night and checked the news, I was saddened to hear of "anomalies" happening around the country while ballots were being counted. In only two minutes of tuning in, 2 blackouts in 2 different schools were reported in Caloocan and Manila, later on reports of missing ballot boxes filled the airwaves, among other things.

While all these were being reported, I looked at my right hand with indelible ink on my index finger and wonder, Is voting worth wasting my P120 manicure? It seems shallow, but I guess that's what elections mean to most people.

Rundown of the Last Two Months

2007-04-26T20:27:00.000+08:00

Has it been that long already? Bad, bad.

James Younghusband of the Philippine national football team guest-hosted on SportsTV for a couple of weeks (a treat for the chikas!). It was fun having him around at the shoot, and even if he's more of the quiet type, he was game for anything. If you don't find him pursuing a hosting career, watch out for him at the Champions League!

Jinno, Bobby, and I on James' (of Summerplace) speedboat for the Boracay special. So Miami Vice! We were there to cover the President's Cup and the Manila to Boracay Race. Though we only stayed a couple of nights and worked most of the time, I made sure I didn't leave without a longgaburger snack! Also had to have the caramel cheesecake at Aria...Yummy!

This is me trying to balance on a lift at the National Cheerleading Championship last March. I'll do better next year!

I Digress

2007-02-24T12:36:00.000+08:00

Oh, yeah, the real reason I was in Palawan was for the 8th Philippine Hobie Challenge. To tell you the truth, I knew zilch about the sport, though I had seen catamarans in the past. This was a race that began in Zambales and ended at Club Paradise in Palawan. I didn't catch the hobies docking because they all came in at night (most of them towed in due to lack of wind). Though I did catch the inshore race on my way back from Calauit Island (which is another story I will post here). Ain't the water amazing!?!

I Left My Heart in Palawan

2007-02-20T23:38:00.000+08:00

It was love at first sight. Even before touching down on Busuanga's little airport, I knew Palawan was going to be my favorite place to be. The sight of the mountain range that eerily resembles Bohol's famous Chocolate Hills, little islands with white sand, bright blue and green waters all from the window of the 19-seater plane took my breath away. As dramatic as it may sound, Palawan deserves all the praise for being hailed the planet's "last frontier". Thus, began my weekend love affair with Palawan.

We landed at around 4pm in a tiny airport, and even overshot the landing strip and ended on the dirt road. By the strip was a small plane that seemed to have veered off from the tarmac and was left there for good. We were greeted by Club Paradise's Jesse who took our bags and loaded them on a jeep that would take us to the dock. We drove through a valley with no sign of inhabitants, except a number of cows grazing freely. The dock was on the Panggawaran River with a seemingly endless row of mangroves sitting on quiet water. It was close to sundown when we reached our final destination.

Where else in the Philippines will you come across monitor lizards or deer on the way to your hotel room? Or wake up to the sound of birds that sound nothing like those in the city? Or take an hour trip on a boat to an untouched island where giraffes and zebras run freely? Or snorkel a couple of meters away from shore to meet a couple of sting ray? My stay at Palawan made me realize that despite my travels to different parts of this country, I've been so ignorant.I have so much more to see.

It was difficult to leave. I can't wait 'til I get back.

Hit (fm) Me, Baby

2007-02-11T16:54:00.000+08:00

Interviews make me nervous. I couldn't sleep last Thursday night anxiously waiting for the next day to arrive. I accepted an invitation to guest on 99.5 Hit FM's morning show, Sheesha with Shivaker, hosted by the station's resident Guru. I woke up at 5:30 even before the sun was up (this is usually the time I reach my REM stage during sleep) because my calltime was 7am at the station (still within my REM stage). I arrived with a few minutes to spare and met the Guru and Issa who reads the news during the show. I had a blast during the interview. Guru asked the weirdest, unexpected and totally unimportant questions from why my given name rhymed with my surname, to my favorite animal, to why I don't eat bananas! I was amazed at how he could carry a whole 3-hour show with this character. It is genius! And a good reason to get up at 7am.

(In the photo: DJ Tracy, me, and the Guru)
*Thanks to Sam Oh (who co-hosts the morning program, Sam vs. Sam, on Hit FM, Mondays to Thursdays) for the invite!
**I'll try to post an audio file here, but I'm still trying to figure out how to do it :P

One More Thing

2007-02-06T21:07:00.000+08:00

Grab a copy of Chalk's April issue (yes, I know April's a long way from now). We just had a shoot last Friday and the concept was quite interesting. Here's a behind-the-scenes snapshot from the shoot. That's me with Jinno Rufino, my co-host, and Tricia Chiongbian of NewsCentral. Gela Laurel did my makeup and I was hesitant to wash it off because it looked great! My hair reached new heights, I swear I got teary-eyed while the stylist pulled it on top of my head. I can't wait to see the finished layout.

A Couple of Late Resolutions

2007-02-06T20:46:00.000+08:00

1. Update this blog!
2. Use a bigger font

2007 for me is all about major commitments and one of them is this blog. Don't worry, I noticed that I haven't updated since 2005, not that nothing interesting has happened since then, but that I've been lazy. C'mon, you know what that's like. Anyway, a new year means a new me, right? So here goes nothing. Next week, I'll begin my regular updates starting with my trip to Palawan over the coming weekend for the Philippine Hobie Challenge. 'Til then, maybe you could read my 2 year old posts.

Hit The Lights

2005-09-07T21:12:00.000+08:00

Sometimes, the littlest things send me into a slight panic. Like lizards, for example. Or maybe leaving the house at 11:02 and not at exactly 11:00. Recently (translation: for the past four years out of college), my solo picture has been one of my sources of slight panic. I guess once you enter the working world, the value of a good head shot increases. Unlike in DLSU, when a teacher requested we submit a 1x1 ID picture of us, his students, stapled to an index card with our bio, I could easily run to the while-u-wait photo booth a few meters away from the campus gate and submit one before the sound of the bell. I couldn't care less what I was wearing (a large t-shirt), how my hair was fixed (it was usually tied), or if I was smiling or not in the photograph--I knew it was going to end up in the trash when then term ended.
When I graduated from college and started submitting my CGs to various companies, the actual need for a good photo of myself came up. This time, I wanted the photo to send a message: that I was mature, dependable, easy to work with, able reached deadlines and that I worked well under pressure. Unfortunately, I didn't feel the need was urgent enough, and I still turned to the while-u-waits that showed that I was a sleepy, pimply, tired, just-out-of-college nineteen year old. At that time, I didn't want to go through the hassle of asking the help of a professional--I couldn't afford it anyway--and I secretly wanted my prospective employers to hire me out of pity after seeing my headshot...then I could really afford a professional photo! (can you sense I'm a genius? No?)
Probably the worst picture I ever submitted with a job application was the full body one (oh god). I had none, or at least I thought I didn't have one. But after going through some old shoeboxes full of older pictures, I found two. I was relieved. One was a grad picture with my blockmates. We were at the ampitheater wearing togas. I actually thought, thank God I was in the front row and I can crop/photoshop everyone elso out! The other was me at the beach wearing shades, a pink tankini with a pink sarong and a huge pink straw hat I was holding against my head to prevent from being blown away by the wind. When I saw it I was even more relieved: I don't have to photoshop anything! So after a two minute internal deliberation (tankini or toga?) I made what I thought was the most practical choice for a photo that would get me hired. I submitted the tankini photo.
A couple of weeks ago, Gilson suggested I work on getting a good photograph. I work as a sportscaster, and now also as a columnist for a sports magazine, both requiring a headshot. He lent me some pro lights from his office that he uses for product shots and they've been in my possession for a week now. The first time I tried them, I quit a minute after the first pop. I had no idea how to work them, and I had every intention of returning it the next day.
The next day came, and Gilson refused to take them back with him saying I didn't even try. Yes, I did! I said. I tried it 4 times (meaning four shots, hehe). And so the lights stayed. Yesterday, I set them up again. That was yesterday noon, to be exact. I tried and tried and tried (it's funny how you can switch the places of the "r" and "i" in the word "tried" and you'll end up "tired" which is how I felt later on). I adjusted the camera's shutter speed, aperture, white balance, flash output, blah blah to match the lights, then uploaded the pictures onto the pc, then ended up disappointed, then called Gilson to complain. This cycle went on until four thirty pm. I was starting to consider taking my photo out at the garage and use natural lighting. Finally, I told him I was going to quit, figuring out how the lights worked was driving me nuts (at that point I identified them as "the enemy"), and I was tired from trying. He coerced me to try one last time. Which I did. I got it right. My last shot was right. And tomorrow, I'll have a professional-looking, well-lit photograph of my sleepy, pimply, tired, twenty-three year old face.

*NOTE: I will be hosting an event this Saturday. I sent my resume to the event coordinator with a photo of myself at a basketball game five years ago. They approved.

Hibiscus Diary

2005-08-29T23:15:00.000+08:00

I've adopted my mom's two gumamela plants given to her by Gilson on Mother's Day. He said they were hardy plants, not needing much attention, just sun and water. Sadly, a couple of weeks later, the hardy plants were hardly plants heavily infested by ants and white stuff on its eyes and flowers. My mom asked our maid to cut off the heavily infested areas, but what was left of the plant was even less than what was cut off. Gilson gave me a few ounces of some pesticide his mom uses on her gumamelas to drive away the aphids. I used it a couple of times then checked some sites about hibiscus care.
It turned out that aphids weren't infesting my plants--aphids are larger than the white stuff on mine--, but rather, mealybugs. White fluffy things that suck the sap outta the plant and attract ants that add more damage to the defenseless gumamelas. But to my relief, a simple remedy was prescribed: rubbing alcohol.
The next day, armed with cotton buds and Green Cross, I put my plants aside and attacked the mealybugs, only to discover the real culprit. As I swiped the white stuff away, the cottony things were just a coverup of the real soft-bodied, almost maggot-like little devils--wolf in damn sheep's clothing! For three days, I fought those pests leaving no leaf unturned. After clearing the mealybugs, I went back to using Gilson's pesticide, using it every other day, and making sure that the soil stays moist.
Since then, the gumamelas look more like the hardy plants they're supposed to be and not the "twigs sticking out of a pot of soil" they were once. I have yet to see blooms again, but at least the leaves are back. But at the rate they're going, and with the crazy weather that (I think) is good for the gumamela (rainy one day, super sunny the next), it won't be long til they start showing their true colors.